Yesterday was, for lack of a better way to describe it, disappointing. I wore an outfit I loved and some people just weren’t into it. That’s ok- I do not expect people to love every outfit I wear. It comes with the territory. What wasn’t ok was the discussion that began about what was or wasn’t flattering for my body and how I should have posed differently to look better in the clothing.
First off, not all clothing I love to wear perfectly accentuates my curves. I don’t always want to be in a bodycon. Somedays I want to be warm or comfortable or just plain lazy. Some things I love to wear don’t make my body look more aesthetically pleasing. Those days and things are just as important and worthy to be seen as the perfect days.
Flattering is a Loaded Word
I’ve always wrestled with the word flattering, because of the context it is usually used in. According to the Cambridge dictionary flattering means to “making someone look or feel better or more attractive than usual.” To say something flatters someone is a shallow compliment, which assumes that the wearer is simply wearing something to look better. Additionally, as attractiveness is highly subjective, one person’s flattering is another person’s “oh hell no.” Plus, flattering often seems to be delivered dripping wet in the stereotypes places on idealized female bodies.
It’s as if flattering is used, in most cases, to deliver the subtext “your body isn’t ideal, but this dress makes it look better than it usually does.” How is that a compliment? And if you do think I look abnormally beautiful- why not just say that? Why use a word so loaded as “flattering’?
In a similar vein of thought, the word “unflattering” delivers the commentary that the individual is wearing something that makes them “less than”. Now there are situations where it’s appropriate to use this word- especially when a person asks you directly. However, most cases it is completely inappropriate to discuss. You’re literally telling a person “you look worse today then you usually do.” Instead just say something isn’t your cup of tea or -even better- say nothing at all. How someone else’s body looks is really none of your business anyways.
In high school there was nothing I wanted more than every pair of pants I owned to be in overall format. I am not sure why, but in the late 2000s, every fabric, every color, every style was best served with a bib and some over the shoulder closures. I suppose that’s why I am so ecstatic that overalls are making an “overall” comeback. As girl who’s pants generally have issues staying up- they also solve all my problems.
This year’s overalls have one major deviation from their predecessors- the fitted waist. Let’s sing all hallelujah to whomever had the critical thought, ” you know if we just added buttons on the side- we could have a fitted waited and an overall.” God bless them.
Today’s look is a celebration of one of my favorite pair of overalls on the market right now- this distressed pair from RWN. Paired with a simple cream turtle neck, yellow duck boots and a fun houndstooth coat (here’s an alternative as this one is sold out) the look is an ode to casual cool. The distressing, fitted waist and design decision to have a tie closure instead of metal clasps make these denim bibs more than just a another rehash of a previous trend. I’m in love.
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In May of 2012 I started on one of the most amazing adventures of my life- working at a then teeny tiny start-up, Sprinklr. I had just moved back from London and that the first week I slept in the office. I had to hit the ground running; there was no time to spare for apartment hunting.
Visiting South Korea with Sprinklr CEO, Ragy Thomas
Over the last 5+ years I have worn many hats. I’ve been a strategic advisor, teaching brands why social media is important and how their business needs to change to support it. I’ve been a webmaster, building the first company website with my CTO over 4 very sleepless days and nights. I’ve been a builder, helping to open offices in London and France. I’ve been an explorer, attending meetings in 15 different countries, often held in a language different than my own. I’ve been a problem solver, fixing issues and finding new ways to do old things, but better. I’ve been an innovator, product managing the future of Sprinklr’s technology. Most importantly I’ve been a friend, building amazing relationships with my coworkers all over the world.
Raising lanterns to celebrate Diwali in Gurgaon, India with Sprinklr developers + designers.
Leaving Sprinklr was not an easy decision. When you are employee twenty-something at a company that grows to just under 2000 in 5 years- it doesn’t feel like work. It feels like family. I used to call our CEO “Papa Ragy” and our then COO “Mama Murali” (because he was the one that would cave if you needed something). Sprinklr’s technology wasn’t our job, it was our baby. So how does one abandon their child?
Too short to ride with a Sprinklr co-worker In London
What I realized was for the first time in my life I was ready to create my own “baby”. It is time to go out on my own. Sprinklr taught me how to be tough and deal with hard situations head on. It taught me to be flexible and “make it work”- you have to do that to survive in a start up. It taught me to be confident- allowing me to present and advise c-level executives all over the world. When I asked myself what’s next? I realized I was ready to stop building someone else’s dream and start building my own.
Bonding in the Hamptons with Sprinklr’s Product Management Team
I will miss seeing my boss and work-husband, Paul, daily the most. I owe much of the rational, kind thinking I’ve developed due to his diligent mentorship. He is part therapist, part genius with a touch of sass and a heaping spoonful of bougie. He taught me you can succeed through patience, understanding and kindness. I hope everyone is able to learn from someone like Paul in their career.
Attending a co-workers wedding with early day’s Sprinklrites
There are so many memories I’ll never forget from my time at Sprinklr. I’ll remember getting our first real office and having to roll our desk chairs through the middle of Herald Square because we didn’t have a budget for movers. I’ll remember finding our first UK headquarters on google as a foreigner in a new country. I’ll remember head-banging with my Indian coworkers so hard I gave one of them a black eye (sorry Chinmay). I’ll remember our CEO after a particularly hard meeting, giving me $600 out of his wallet and telling me spend all of it in the next 24 hours enjoying myself (that is also the story of how I bought every single karaoke session at Silver Linings in San Francisco one night) . I’ll remember saying uber over and over with my French team- because it sounds delightfully ridiculous with a Parisian accent. I’ll remember the company award that was created to acknowledge my hard work one holiday season, that’s now a symbol of excellence in the company. I’ll remember the interns I mentored and watched as their careers flourished. I’ll remember what it felt like to do the impossible simply because you supported each other and believed you could. Sprinklr taught me that passion and hard work really can change the world.
Dancing it out on stage at Sprinklr’s “Happy Together” Party at SXSW 2014
What I’ll remember most is that they let me do it all as me- weird, silly, sing-songy, dancing, dog-toting, me. As evidenced by the photo above at a company event and the terrible (and hopefully lost for good) animated gif of me drunk dancing that was once dubbed everyone’s “favorite part of SXSW 2014.” Finding a company that gets out of your way, lets you be your true self and watches you flourish is incredibly rare. The people I have met here have changed me for the better. The things I have experienced have taught me just how much I am truly capable of. Thank you for preparing me for my next big adventure, Sprinklr. Thank you even more for letting me be me.
Taking Sprinklr conference calls in the Pool in Miami
Today I am giving my review of a brand you guys have requested I haul more than any other brand- Maurice’s. Maurice’s is a size inclusive brand that offers clothing from sizes 0 to 28. Now candidly, I have purchased from this store before, but only one specific items. Maurice’s makes some of the most comfortable plus size leggings out there and I’ve been addicted to them since I first tried them. However, for some weird reason I’ve never purchased anything else from them, so I think the term ” a brand new to me” still applies.
Trying Out Maurice’s Plus Size For The First Time
The look I styled from my Maurice’s haul is the perfect for a comfy day at the office. I paired their window-paned treggings with a super soft green cowl neck with herringbone rib details and topped it with an open black cardigan with lace up back. I used an obi style belt to wrap the cardigan closed and finished the look with a pair of well-worn Bass brogues. The outfit is delightfully cozy and I swear it feels like I’m still in pajamas. I’m a fan.
My Final Review
Overall, Maurice’s is an excellent option for plus size ladies who want no fuss, comfortable clothing that can be dressed up or down as needed. I love that they are size inclusive and offer plus size up to a 4x. The clothing is definitely cut with a plus body in mind and I noticed the arms were delightfully roomier than many other plus options. I was also super impressed with how quickly items were shipped and delivered. I received my order with 3-4 days; 3 days sooner than anticipated. The only complaint I have is that the treggings- while stretchy- have some design elements that don’t work for ladies with larger hips/booties.The haulvideo below shows each item from my trial order and how they fit. Final verdict: I would recommend Maurice’s as a great place to shop for plus size clothing.
Over the last 6 months I found myself dragged into the politics of blogging. I heard gossip, I repeated gossip and in the end no one was better for it. Before I get into some deep thoughts, here’s the outfit details. The dress and Jacket are from Fashion to Figure. They are worn with Maurice’s leggings, booties and a contemplative expression.
It’s so easy. You hear something- a tidbit, a thought, and opinion and next thing you know you’ve passed it on to someone else without even a second thought. It happens so organically it can be hard to realize you’ve even done it. But eventually the drama spreads and a small comment becomes something that might negatively affects someone’s life.
Over the past month I’ve reached out and apologized to people I’ve felt my gossiping might have hurt. It was overwhelming. I did it because I didn’t like this bad habit and I felt I dramatically needed to correct it. I did it because I was sorry. In most cases, it was much more meaningful to me than the person involved. One person laughed at me, shocked I would apologize for such behavior. It was normal, after all.
I am realizing that gossip is a toxic destructive behavior we pass off as common and acceptable. Its ok to posture. It’s ok to assume. It’s ok to take everything you hear as absolute truth. But it’s not. Gossip is just a manifestation of jealousy, inadequacy, and denial wrapped up a socially acceptable package.
I look back to the incidents where I found my gossiping. Sometimes it was easier to talk about someone else than myself. Sometimes I wanted what other people have. Sometimes even surrounded by people I felt lonely and just wanted to be included. Why didn’t I say these words. Why didn’t I let people react to me? Why did I hide behind the stories of others?
As I have begun to dissect why I gossip and what I am using it to deflect from, I have realized that I have never won by gossiping. I have only lost. Lost opportunities to really connect with people. Lost chances to be vulnerable. Lost chances to change my experience. I am painfully learning bad habits die hard- especially when they are ingrained into our everyday culture. However, as I have learned many times in my life- the hardest things to do are often the most rewarding. I’ll keep trying and as result keep growing in the process.
Today I am giving my review of a brand you guys have requested I haul more than any other brand- Maurice’s. Maurice’s is a size inclusive brand that offers clothing from sizes 0 to 28. Now candidly, I have purchased from this store before, but only one specific items. Maurice’s makes some of the most comfortable plus size leggings out there and I’ve been addicted to them since I first tried them. However, for some weird reason I’ve never purchased anything else from them, so I think the term ” a brand new to me” still applies.
